The President holds his first wartime press conference at his Doral golf resort.

Hon. Sunday afternoon. The President of the United States, on the first wartime press conference of his second term, did not hold it in the White House briefing room. Did not hold it at the Pentagon. Did not hold it at Camp David. He held it at his golf resort in Doral, Florida. In the ballroom he had used the day before for the Shield of the Americas summit. The podium was the same podium. The flags were the same flags. The coffee, hon, was the same coffee.

The press conference ran for forty minutes. In the forty minutes, hon, the President said the following things, in this order, on the record, on the same stage, into the same microphone.

He said the war is almost over. He said the war has only just begun. He said the leadership of Iran is gone. He said we haven’t won enough. He said the war will be over very soon. He said Mojtaba Khamenei is not the supreme leader he would have chosen. He said the United States does not seek regime change in Iran. He said the Iranian regime is finished. He said oil prices are coming way down. He said oil prices are up because of bad management by Iran.

Hon. Pick any two. I will wait. You cannot hold any two of those statements at the same time and have them both be true. That is not how English works. That is not how war works. That is not how foreign policy works. That is not how anything works.

The press, hon, in the room, asked the President to clarify. The President said the war is going great. The press, hon, in the room, asked the President to clarify the clarification. The President said the leadership is gone. The press, hon, in the room, asked which leadership. The President pointed to the back of the room and called on the next reporter.

What is also true, hon, is that the press conference was held at the Trump National Doral. The podium rental, hon, was paid by the federal government, on a contract, to the Trump Organization. That contract, hon, exists. Public records. The taxpayers, hon, paid the President’s company to host the press conference in which the President contradicted himself ten times in forty minutes.

That, hon, is what we call value engineering at the diner. You charge the customer for the coffee and the bagel and the seat at the counter and the air in the room and also the radio playing in the corner and you say it is one bill. It is not one bill. It is six bills. And you charge for each one.

Forty-eight hours later, the cost of the war, on the Pentagon’s own count, will be eleven point three billion dollars. Six days. Eleven point three billion. The President, on Sunday, said the war is over. The Pentagon, on Wednesday, will say the war is eleven billion dollars in. Both, hon, cannot be true.

Funny how that works.